Ronni and Adam

Shifting Priorities

2010-04-12T03:57:00.002-05:00

As Adam and I freewheel in our second year of marriage, our priorities are changing and shifting. I suppose it's only natural. I remember when I was so bored and frustrated in Columbus, but I am wondering how much of that was a "home is where the heart is" type of situation. Adam wasn't there, so I was unhappy. But now, I'm finding myself missing it very much.

Over the past several months, we've dealt with a few low blows, but they were more than counteracted with highs. We've met new friends. Adam's book I Kissed A Zombie and I Liked It is getting rave reviews and he's selling foreign rights like crazy! Things work out just the way they're supposed to.

Even thought I grew up in Cleveland OH, a big city, I am not used to the intensity of a big city. I'd spent 13 years in Columbus, which is a mid-sized city in central OH. I miss Columbus, even with all its Ohio State insanity. I miss not having to pay sales tax on groceries. I miss cheaper groceries (oh Marc's) and not being scared to drive without being honked at. I miss my friends and I really miss being close to Aidan. I'm pretty homesick. And for the love of God, I need to see lots of green grass and trees and flowers and stars at night.

We've been weighing our options. I went on Craigslist yesterday and compared housing prices there with housing prices here. The difference is astounding. Book checks would stretch SO MUCH farther there. And there is Aidan. He's there. I should be. And again, the fees and prices and nickel and diming here is outrageous. 10.25% sales tax. 13.25% for pop (which is part of the reason I stopped drinking it). Parking tickets. Parking in general. The fact that they make it SO inconvenient to own a car, yet threaten to shut down the CTA every six months. The competitiveness in the job market. Hoops, hoops, hoops. Having to jump through so many hoops for and during interviews. Taking 25 minutes to go three miles because there are so many traffic lights, cars, cyclists, and pedestrians on the road. People on top of people because dwellings are so close together. Schools aren't great. Crime's not great (I really am tired of people breaking out my car windows). Rush hour happens at any given time. You just never know around here.

And yet, I know that if I leave Chicago, I'll miss it. I like knowing I can hop on the Blue Line and go shopping on State Street. I like having the American Girl store be a 15 minute bus ride from the apartment. I can walk to the bank, to the CVS, to Subway, to the Italian grocer on the corner for a good sandwich (provided the line's not out the door, as it tends to get at lunchtime). I would miss the friends I've made here, and the opportunities for networking as an author are amazing. The downtown is beautiful, especially in the spring. There's the lake. I can walk to the yoga studio. It's not unusual to randomly see a celebrity walking down the street (this is more Adam's thing than mine, with his early morning walks and all). That kind of stuff is really, really cool. And I'd miss that.

So I'm really torn. I am scared that I'll go back to Columbus and get bored and frustrated again, but I am frustrated here as well. Adam and I weigh the pros and cons all the time. Of course, the family wants us in Ohio. It'd make sense financially. It's familiar (to me). Well, it used to be. I read old journal entries and I get sad because well, I don't remember those streets anymore although I used to travel them all the time. Finding freelance proofreading work there would be quite a challenge, as the market's already pretty saturated.

Once upon a time, Adam used to say he'd ALWAYS want to live in the city. But now, he's changing. And I change all the time. I think the best thing to do is to be open at what the Universe has in store for us. No matter what, it'll be what's meant to happen.

:)

2009-09-22T13:08:00.002-05:00

Things very good.

I'm back to being a house husband for a while, as Ronni is back in the office (the GOOD one - there are so many horror stories of companies who have their heads in their butts). Cooking, cleaning, the whole bit. Still working as a tour guide and writer myself, and probably teaching a class out in the burbs in November.

Ronni is a kick-ass proofreader.

One Year!

2009-07-28T01:59:00.003-05:00

Adam and I made it one year! And it was a fantastic year. He put up with my moodiness, my many "voices," my obsession with Disney and American Girl dolls. He makes me dinner. He does the dishes and the laundry. He surprises me with donuts. He supports me. He has my back. He cares about me. He loves me. I love him.

For our anniversary, he bought me an American Girl doll. I got him Punch Out for Wii, and boxing gloves to go with it.

He's a keeper. I'm going to keep him.

It's Been A While!

2009-05-29T06:43:00.004-05:00

Adam and I are still settling nicely into married life. I can't believe that our anniversary is in less than two months! The year (even the everlastingly long winter!) seems to have sped by!

Adam takes really good care of me. He does most of the cooking, and he keeps the kitchen fairly clean. He also handles a great deal of the laundry. I love that he helps so much around the house. But that kind of stuff aside, he is just an incredibly supportive person. He's on my side, you know? And it's nice to know that someone will always be in my corner. After all, that's what being married is about. Having that partner. That commitment. Working to build a wonderful life together.

Since I last updated here, Adam and I went to Columbus to visit Aidan for Christmas, which was a lot of fun. Within that visit, we drove to Cleveland to see my mom and to see Andy. Aidan got loads of stuff. His dad was able to throw out all of Aidan's old clothes and replace them with all new things, that's how much he got. It was overwhelming!

Shortly after that, Adam and I went to Los Angeles to visit friends and family. We got to hang out with Eli and Melissa, Amy, and Tasha. I got to visit a lot of places--the Disney Studios, Griffith Observatory, Roscoe's Chicken & Waffles--and Melissa and Eli took us to Disneyland! Visiting L.A. in winter is nice, I'm not going to lie. But coming back to cold Chicago was hard!

Aidan's come to visit twice, and both times he was a complete joy. He'll be here for the whole summer on June 20th. At the end of the summer, we're taking a family trip to Disney World! I figure I should do it now while I can, and before he decides he's too cool for such things.

I'm looking forward to the summer. I hope to hit the beach more and generally do more stuff outside.

And I'll try to update more here! I promise! 'Til next time!

Marriage Survey

2008-12-16T20:56:00.003-06:00

1. What is your spouse's name?
Adam <3

2. How long have you been married?
142 days

3. How long were you together before you got married?
Just over two years.

4. Where did you get married?
Edgewater Beach, Lake Michigan (Chicago)

5. Where did you propose or were proposed to?
Margie's Candies

6. Have you ever been married before your current marriage?
Yes

7. Who "wears the pants" in the house?
We share the pants.

8. Who is the "bread-winner"?
We take turns.

9. Do you have any children?
Not together. I have little Aidan from my first marriage.

10. Do you have any pets?
Two cats. One is currently sitting on my lap, purring, and putting his cold, wet nose on my hand.

11. How many times a week do just the two of you go out?
We don't go out a lot, we hang out at home mostly.

12. Do you have separate checking accounts?
Yes.

13. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
Right

14. Who does the laundry?
He does most of it.

15. Who cooks?
He does most of it. :)

16. Who cleans?
I do most of it, but he cleans the kitchen.

17. Do you share a vehicle or each have your own?
We share one, but most of the time we walk, or take the train or bus.

18. Do you get along with your in-laws?
Definitely. I love them!

19. Do you argue with your spouse?
Not really.

20. Are you good at pampering?
Not so much. :O

21. What is your favorite physical feature of your spouse?
His hair, his face, his lips, his butt, his stomach, his voice... oh man, he's cute. :)

22. Name one thing you would change about your spouse?
*shrug*

23. Name a movie that will always remind you of your spouse?
Hmm. Juno. We saw it together in NYC just over a year ago, the first movie we ever saw at a theatre together. Wait, no it wasn't. Hairspray was. But still. Juno.

24. Do you own a home or rent a place?
We rent a cool place close to downtown Chicago.

25. What is your wedding date?
July 27, 2008

Love

2008-10-21T12:59:00.002-05:00

Love,
originally uploaded by LilRonGal.

Adam and I went to Disney World for our honeymoon. This is one of the Photopass pictures, taken by photographers on site. It's also one of my favorites.

See all of our honeymoon pictures here!!!

Wedding Pictures

2008-08-24T12:48:00.003-05:00

This picture was taken by Kelly of Kelly Heasley Photography.

See more of hers and photographs of others here. :)

Significant Other Quiz

2008-08-24T11:30:00.006-05:00

1. They are watching TV… What are they watching?
West Wing on DVD, The Simpsons, My Boys, How I Met Your Mother, or an old black and white movie.

2. You’re out to eat. what kind of dressing do they get on their salad.
Italian or Ranch or something new and different.

** (He says he wouldn't get Ranch)

3. What’s one food this person doesn’t like?
Okra.

4. You go out to the bar. He/she orders……
We wouldn't. But if we did, it would be some sort of beer. Or an Effen Black Cherry with 7up, if we were at The Liar's Club.

5. Where did he/she go to high school?
He went to two different high schools. One made him miserable, so he transferred to a cool alternative school.

6. What size shoe do they wear?
Wow, I don't know this one. I'm going to guess a 10 or 11.

7. If this person were to collect anything, it would be?
Music. And he's got a collection of Star Wars figures, and also weird historical stuff like Bull Moose party flags.

8. What is their favorite type of sandwich?
He likes just about every sandwich they make at Bari.

9. This person could eat __________ everyday
cereal or pizza

10. Favorite cereal?
Hmmm. I don't know if he has a favorite; he tends to rotate.

11. This person wouldn’t be caught dead wearing…
Pink. Unless I made him wear it.

12. Favorite sports team?
Cubs.

13. Who will he/she vote for?
Barack Obama. He's a very outspoken supporter.

14. What is their sign?
Cancer.

15. What is something you do that he/she wishes you didn’t?
Talk in a baby voice so much.

16. How many states has this person lived in?
Three.

17. What is his/her’s heritage?
Russian and I think German.

**(He says Irish and a buncha other stuff)

18. You bake them a cake for their birthday, what is it?
I wouldn't bake it, I'd get him an ice cream cake.

19. Did he/she play sports in high school?
No.

20. This person could spend hours…
Playing on the computer, researching history, writing, and reading.

2008-08-13T13:25:00.002-05:00

What Your Ideal Wedding Dress Says About You

Your Personal Style:
Classic and elegant. You prefer to make a statement with a few quality pieces.

Your Ideal Wedding:
Traditional and formal, but not tacky. You think the most beautiful weddings are understated.

Your Philosophy on Marriage:It's a serious commitment, and the couple entering it should be ready to work for their relationship.

Your Perfect Marriage:
Is calm, stable, deep, and meaningful.

The Wedding Dress Test

Married!

2008-07-28T16:58:00.001-05:00

We're married!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!

Wedding Stuff & Registry

2008-06-26T17:53:00.003-05:00

Today, Adam and I went and got our marriage license. It was surprisingly hassle-free. There was no line, and we didn’t have to swear we weren’t drunk or there against our will. He did ask if we were related, though.

Anyway, the details consist of this:

Ronni & Adam’s “Elopement”
Date: July 27, 2008
Time: 10:30am
Location: Edgewater Beach (rain or shine!)

If you want a ride, Adam’s planning something with the Weird Chicago bus. Will probably meet at the Rock & Roll McDonald’s at 10am or so and head down from there. I’ll get clearer details on that soon.

Also, the Disney honeymoon registry is up. Disney's site isn't the most stable, so if it errs, try it again. Here's the url:

http://www.mydisneyhoneymoon.com/booknerds

And you can search for Adam Selzer or Ronni Davis, July 2008. ºOº

New wedding date!

2008-06-17T13:29:00.004-05:00

Hey, everybody!
No offense or anything, but we decided that rather than blowing a pile of money on a ceremony, we'd rather blow it on Disneyworld. So that's we're going to do.

We're moving the date to Sunday, July 27th. The ceremony will be a quick "before anyone asks for our permit" affair at a beach on Lake Michigan - probably Edgewater beach up on the North side. Some transportation from downtown may be available via the Weird Chicago bus.

We'll update with time, etc, very soon! Anyone who wants to come is welcome!

Settling In

2008-05-05T18:23:00.002-05:00

It's been a while since I have posted. (And Adam too, for that matter!) It's been weeks of getting settled in, looking for a job, and trying to figure out my way around here. Things are certainly interesting. The cost of living is definitely higher. I see it mostly in food and fuel, but I guess that's being felt by everyone everywhere. Gas here hovers at around $4 a gallon, so I try not to drive anywhere except the grocery store. Thank God Chicago has a decent public transportation system. Well, the trains are cool, at least. The buses--I've never been a fan of buses and here, give me the train any day.

We do most of our grocery shopping at ALDI. If I am DESPERATE for some Hunts tomato sauce or Doritos or Quaker granola bars, I'll go to Bari or CVS. The grocery stores here are not that cheap, but if you catch a sale on the things you need, it can work out great. The 25 oz. box of Froot Loops I got for $4 at Jewel-Osco? SCORE. The 65 cents for a can of Hunts tomato sauce? Unscore. :(

The job search is hard. On the one hand, I like taking my time waking up in the mornings, and having the day to do whatever. On the other hand, I don't like not making a lot of money. Bills don't stop just because you don't have a job, and the market is soooo competitive and discouraging at times. In a few weeks, I'll be poised to seriously panic.

So, I think once I am working, I will feel more at home. Plus, in a month, Aidan comes for the summer, which should be fun and interesting.

All in all, I'm getting there.

Our Crib!

2008-03-30T19:07:00.002-05:00

All Moved In

2008-03-20T22:20:00.002-05:00

Well, all my stuff is moved in, anyway. Whether or not I am actually all settled is a whole different question!

The kitchen is unpacked. The bedroom and bathroom are pretty much set up... except there is some outstanding stuff that I need to figure out what to do with it. Will probably be in Aidan's/guest room for the time being. The office stuff/desktop computer will be the most challenging, I think. But I'll get through it.

Adam's home! See ya! :)

----------------
Now playing: Nelly Furtado - No Hay Igual
via FoxyTunes

A Meme??

2008-03-14T21:49:00.003-05:00

1. How long have you been together? Time flies when you're having fun. ♥
2. How old is he? 27
3. How old are you? 33. I'm a cougar. :)
4. Who eats more? He definitely does.
5. Who said "I love you" first? He did. :)
6. Who is taller? He is.
7. Who sings better? He can actually hit notes sometimes. Me? Not so much.
8. Who is smarter? Well, he's full of the weirdest facts, but I have my own talents. I'm sure of it. :O
9. Who does the laundry? That remains to be seen. I know he likes to do his own, but I actually enjoy the washing and drying part. It's the folding and putting away that I'm not so great at.
10. Who does the dishes? I'm ~~thinking~~ hoping that'll be his job. *innocent look*
11. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? You know, it'll probably be me. That side'll be closer to the bathroom.
12. Who pays the bills? We'll pay our own personal bills but he'll probably handle the household stuff.
13. Who mows the lawn? No lawn.
14. Who cooks dinner? He says he's going to do most of the cooking, which is probably a good thing. He'd be eating lots of spaghetti if it was up to me.
15. Who is more stubborn? Eh, I think I am.
16. Who kissed whom first? I kissed him first but he took over for the next ten or twenty. :)
17. Who asked whom out? Hmm, there really wasn't that. It was more "I like you. I like you, too. OK, then."
18. Who proposed? He did.
19. Who is more sensitive? I am.
20. Who has more friends? About the same, probably.
21. Who has more siblings? He does.

EEEEK! I move in just a few days! WOW!!!!

----------------
Now playing: Sara Groves - When the Saints
via FoxyTunes

Panicky Me?

2008-03-02T17:58:00.002-06:00

Today, Adam called just as I was getting into packing up clothing and singing Les Miserables. I asked him if I was panicking about packing, and he told me that I was. I mean, I DO have two weeks to get it together, but I really don't want to be rushing around at the last minute, throwing things wherever, making a mess. I want to be organized.

With that said, I have my high school graduation and my college graduation gowns still. Caps, too. For some reason, I can't bring myself to get rid of them! I'll see if they make the cut this time around. I guess if they fit into the knickknack bin, they can stick around for a bit longer. And hey, if I go to grad school, I'll already have a cap and gown for it. (My college cap and gown is black, the high school one is gold).

The hardest thing has been the OFFICE SUPPLIES. I had a lot of knickknacks on my desk when I worked at Nationwide. I need to get ruthless. I also found a stack of letters. I can never resist letters. Hmm, knickknack bin, I suppose. Oh, and I found my BoysIIMen CD with Motownphilly on it, plus a bunch of other CDs I'd "lost." Good times.

Anyway, this was a pretty pointless post, but the fact remains that two weeks from now, I'm going to be finalizing things for my move to Chicago. HOLY CRAP. Three weeks from now, I'll actually be living there. *gulp*

Send good and productive vibes my way, please! :)

On The Move

2008-02-24T11:26:00.007-06:00

Heehee, yes, my finacé is right. And even though I should be up to my ears packing right now, I'm posting here. I will do some packing this afternoon. All my office and desk stuff, and all the clothes that are not in season, and my decorations is what I hope to have done by Tuesday of this week.

It really is not much longer 'til I'll be heading west for the next adventure of my life. OK, it's only about 400 miles west, but it's still west!

Am I nervous?

Heck yes! This is the biggest move of my life! The only other big move I did was coming to college. Even then, it was only from Cleveland to Columbus, Ohio. This is two states, a 6–7 hour drive. But people do much bigger moves than I do all the time. I know I can do it.

What am I nervous about?

1. Not having my place all packed up in time! I have a lot of stuff, and although I am planning to get rid some of it, it's still hard to get motivated to do something like packing. AND the bad thing is that I usually get motivated around 10am, while I am at work. By the time I get home, I'm ready to crash on the couch. But that's the life of the working person. I have to force myself to do it. I do not want to be scrambling two or three days before Andy shows up with the U-Haul. The sorting is going to drive me nuts. I already have a pile of stuff to give to Goodwill, but bags and shoes I don't use, and clothes I don't wear is easy. Stuffed animals and certain knick-knacks is what's going to be hard to part with. Keeping the big picture in mind helps me be more ruthless, though.

2. The drive out to Chicago. Adam will be with me in the car, and we will be able to switch off, which is good. But I have never driven more than 2.5 hours on my own before. And I have driven 3 hours... but 6–7 hours? I'm a ~~bit~~ lot nervous. I think we're going to split the drive in half, or switch off every couple hours. I plan to make a MOVING playlist for the iPod. Anyone have any recommendations for songs to keep me awake while I am driving? Adam is threatening me with NPR.

3. Learning a new way of life in Chicago. Columbus is not very urban. I drive everywhere. The thought of driving in Chicago scares me a bit. There is almost always loads of traffic, and there are insane cabbies all over the place. And people are MEAN and aggressive. Columbus is full of either right assholes in big vehicles or people who trudge along at speeds well below the posted speed limit. Right now, I am pretty centrally located in Columbus, so I just hop in my car and 5–10 minutes later, I'm where I need to be. My commute to work is about 12 minutes. In Chicago, I am going to have to get used to twice that long, or 3–4 times that long if I'm taking the train or the bus, even if where I need to be is 2 miles from where I live.

I don't worry much about getting lost while driving. Not only is there Mapquest or Google Maps, but I have a decent sense of direction, and usually once I find my way somewhere, I can get there again without any help. But I'm going to have to learn public transportation all over again, and I can totally see myself going the wrong way on the trains or hopping on the wrong bus. Thank God I'll be living in a centrally located area in Chicago, but it's still a bit unnerving!

Plus, they make it such a pain in the butt to own a car out there. The whole "City of Chicago" sticker that is required of residents out there is just a money-making ploy. Parking for work downtown costs a ton. And just getting my license and registration transferred over is going to cost well over $100. But I doubt I'd get what I still owe on the car if I sold it, and I will not be paying for something I can't use!

I will be looking for a new job shortly after I move out there. There are plenty of opportunities that look interesting, but we're going into a recession and that worries me a bit. In the best of times, companies aren't that great to potential employees. But we'll see. I'd like to get a job doing what I do now, but again, I'll have to see what's out there, and who is willing to take me on. Just getting an interview proves challenging when the economy is like this.

My life has been one huge milestone after another since 2000, so this whole ordeal is just another one to add to the list. That's why I know I can do it, I know I WILL do it, even though my nerves sometimes try to overtake the excitement.

Chicago-bound 2008! :)

Moving!

2008-02-24T07:34:00.002-06:00

I've booked my ticket to Ohio to get Ronni moved out to Chicago next month. YYYAAAAYYYY!!!!!!

Not House Hunting

2008-02-01T19:28:00.000-06:00

Adam and I decided not to look for a new apartment for now. We weighed the pros and cons, and decided it made sense to stay where we are. My main concern was the idiot college boy neighbors, but I figure I have a few months to figure out how to put the fear of God into them so they won't be too loud and obnoxious.

Because honestly, his current place has all we need. He's got it all customized. Crookshanks is there, and Lucy is welcome. It's nicely sized, and it has a dishwasher and central air. It has a bathtub as well. It's close to bus and train stops, Sip is a 5 minute walk away, there are yummy restaurants around, a CVS nearby, and some street parking. If the obnoxious idiot with the big truck wouldn't HOG...

So, we saved some money. And decided to seriously redecorate his current place. Okay, it was more like I planted the seed and as I hoped, he ran with it. :) He's really into decorating. Me? Not so much. He was so ready to set up a new place, so I told him to rearrange. He did. He'll have to do a lot more when I show up with my U-Haul of crap.

So now that he's getting things set up, it's starting to feel a bit more real. There are still a few months before I actually move in, but every day brings me closer to that time.

299

2008-01-06T21:47:00.000-06:00

Okay, so 299 is still a pretty big number, but when I checked the counter today and it said 299 days until your wedding, I panicked. Just a little. Not because I don't want to marry Adam, but because of all the PLANNING I have not done recently. So what did I do? I hopped over to theknot.com to check on the planner. Now I am down to 168 things I need to do. Most of it needs to wait until I get some extra cash. And I have not tried on one dress yet. For some reason, the wedding still seemed so far away, but seeing that first number go from a 3 to a 2 is kind of showing me that time is indeed moving. Pretty soon, serious planning will have to take place. I have no idea what that means, but eeek.

Adam hung out with Aidan over the holidays, and that was a really fun, special time. All Adam had to do was play Alpha Butt for Aidan to warm up to him, but Aidan had been warm to him anyway, and he gave Adam a hug the second he walked in the door. They played together very well, and Adam has a gentle way with Aidan that even I can't master completely. I don't know if it still kind of makes Adam nervous, the prospect of being a step-father, but I think he's going to be a great one. It helps that Aidan's such a great kid. :)

So, on the one hand, it seems like AGES and AGES until the wedding. I'm ready to settle into life with Adam. I'm ready to not be alone all the time. I mean, it can't be healthy, how much I like being by myself. I often forget how nice it is to have someone around just to make random observations with, watch TV with, or to even bring me a cup of tea.

But on the other hand, in terms of planning, it seems like it'll be here in a flash, and I'm not doing a damn thing about it. Eloping sometimes sounds like such a great idea, but I'm not selfish enough to do that, not when there are two families plus lots of friends who want to be there for when Adam and I tie the knot.

So, I shall prevail in the planning. Whenever I actually resume planning. Which will be soon... I think. ;)

House hunting!

2008-01-02T08:17:00.000-06:00

We're now knee-deep in the process of finding a new apartment here in Chicago - I hope to meet with our leasing agent down at the landlord's office.

I have looked at one nearly perfect place - it's about a block away from my current place, right across the street from an elementary school. It's slightly smaller than my current place, I think, but it has some definite benefits, including:

- free electricity

- washer and dryer in unit

- storage space

- pantry

- lower rent than I currently have

The big problem with it is that I'd have to wheel and deal a bit to get to move there, since it's a different landlord than I currently have (my lease isn't actually up til October), plus there's a month-and-a-half security deposit that might go up after the credit check.

So here's hoping the landlord can find us a deal to match it!

In Sickness and In Health

2007-12-04T21:04:00.000-06:00

One hard thing about being in a long-distance relationship is when one of us gets sick, and the other can't be there. I was sooo sick Sunday night, and yesterday, and I felt so alone and I felt like crying because no one was there to hold me or rub my back. I can't wait until I don't have to be alone when I am sick anymore. And I can't wait until I can take care of him as well.

Registered, New Family, Marriage

2007-11-25T19:37:00.000-06:00

Adam and I spent last week together, with his family, in Atlanta. We popped in to Target to do our first registry. Good times. :)

We both had fun with the gun, even though it yelled at us from time to time. We tried to register for things that'll be around for a while there rather than seasonal stuff; the wedding is still almost a year away. What's challenging is that he and I both like fall colors, like oranges and browns and reds, and those are seasonal!

Speaking of the wedding, I haven't done anything major with plans in a while. Well, I did pop into the Jessica McClintock store to peep at some of the dresses, but that's it. I'm not sure I should even be worrying about much until I move. It'll just be easier once I'm living in Chicago.

But, we're registered at Target. At first, I thought about registering at least one more place—probably Bed, Bath & Beyond or Linens & Things, but we'll see.

I had a great time with the Selzers in Atlanta. We celebrated Thanksmas, which is a fun combination of Christmas and Thanksgiving. With Eli & Melissa in California, myself in Ohio, and Adam in Illinois, it's hard to travel a lot this time of year for both holidays. Sooooo, Adam's mom, Sharon, decided to combine the two holidays.

It was a lot of fun. Sharon had told me once that I really fit in with the family, and I really felt like it all last week. :) I hear these stories about in-laws not getting along and I feel fortunate that won't be a problem for me. I'm going to like being a Selzer.

2007-11-09T18:06:00.001-06:00

It's finally less than a year until the wedding. Instead of thinking, "Oh good, we've crossed that year threshold," I'm more eager and anxious. Time as going as slowly as ever.

I think it'll be easier when I'm living in Chicago.

Yay

2007-11-01T07:26:00.001-05:00

One year to go - I guess this makes this our pre-anniversary! I'm so excited!

A Year From Tonight...

2007-10-31T20:46:00.001-05:00

I wonder what I'll be doing? How I'll be feeling?

Hard Day

2007-10-30T20:00:00.000-05:00

I'm having a hard time today.

The last time I saw Adam was September 17th. I won't see him again until the middle of November. That's three weeks away.

October is always rough month, simply because he's so busy with the Weird Chicago tours. He's working every weekend, plenty of days, and week nights as well. Not only is October long by virtue of being a five-Monday month this year, (and having its normal 31 days), but not seeing your fiancé for so long is hard.

Thank GOD tomorrow is the last day.

It's hard because I've gone so long without seeing him, and to think I have so much more longer to go... *sigh*

It's hard not to get angry at TIME, as it creeps by during the work day/work week, and it crawls when I'm waiting to see Adam... and then when the weekend FINALLY gets here, the time speeds up and flashes by. The weekend, or week, or whatever, is gone in a flash, and it's back to the waiting. Always with the waiting.

This won't be the longest I've gone without seeing him. Earlier this year, I went from not seeing him from February 18th to May 2nd. That doesn't make it any easier, though. And it makes planning for the wedding way more challenging than it already is.

The goodbyes are getting old. The tears in the airport. It's getting harder and harder to tolerate them now, and there are still several months of this ahead. It's hard not to get jealous of the couples who get to be together all the time. It's hard not to be angry at circumstances, at life, at the restrictions which are keeping me here.

This long distance stuff...I am SO OVER it. :(

How Are The Plans Going?

2007-10-25T17:24:00.000-05:00

Today at work, Janet asked me how the plans were going. I sat there and realized I hadn't done a concrete thing for the wedding since we booked the place. I went to The Knot and went to the checklist. I checked off a lot of things, but the list says I have 172 more to go.

Eeek, much?

Granted, it's still just over a year away and I have PLENTY of time, but it's hard not to see such a huge number of things to do and not panic. Plus, we need to find a photographer after all (for the more formal and traditional shots), and there are LOTS and LOTS to choose from in Chicago. That's a ~~little bit~~ lot overwhelming!

This is what I am tempted to do for the boquets: Head over to the grocery store the day of the ceremony and pick up some of the flowers there. My first choice is an orange gerbera daisy, but man, the thought of dealing with all this stuff is kind of making me hyperventilate.

I got a few sample invitations in the mail. Thank God places let you see samples. The really inexpensive ones from Ann's Bridal Bargains aren't that great, and the Mickey Mouse ones are too big. I REALLY like these:

Of course, they're from my favorite place, Invitations By Dawn. The color I really like is called Tuscan Sun, and it's the orangy-looking one on the right, behind the light green ones. I can get 50 for $102.80, and 50 response folders (with envelopes) for $55.50. I don't think that's too unreasonable, especially for an invitation I really like, but I can't help but wonder if there aren't some that are less expensive. I mean, it's so simple, after all. But there's just something about the color—it's perfect.

We'e been getting requests to register. I think we're going to hit our first store next month, when we're together for Thanksgiving. We could register online, but then we wouldn't get the little gun. Adam really wants to use the little gun.

So, I'm trying not to freak out too much here. After all, I do have more than a year for everything to fall into place. No need to stress. Right?

Talking Marriage

2007-10-10T21:02:00.000-05:00

Today, I stumbled across an article titled Ten Things to Consider Before Getting Married. Lots of food for thought.

I forwarded the article to Adam and it opened up a nice dialogue of some of our expectations, habits, compromises we'll have to make, etc. It was good. We found that we're pretty much in alignment with everything.

If I haven't learned anything else from before, I did learn that communication is SO very important. Sure, people say that all the time, but it's really true. The thing is, I'm very non-confrontational. If someone does something and I get upset by it, I find it hard to go to the person and say "Hey, it really bugged me when you did blah blah blah." But I've found that when I suck it up and say something, a few things happen.

1. He gets a chance to explain what he meant or why he said it or whatever.
2. I get to realize that it probably wasn't as bad as I thought it was.
3. The air is cleared.

I'm not carrying around this hidden resentment and bitterness, everything is cleared up, and we can move on. In the past, I used to hold stuff in, let it fester, and then something small would push me over the edge and I would shut down. I am terrible with The Silent Treatment. It is so much easier (at least, right away) to shut down and stew. But these days, I force myself out of my comfort zone and actually TALK about whatever is bothering me. It's so much better for both of us this way. And in the long run, a lot easier than letting stuff build up.

The article talks about "plans," and he outlines the basics for starting a conversation about 1-, 3-, 6-, and 9-year plans. Those things cover meatier topics, but I think we can manage it. :) I *LIKE* to talk about relationship-related stuff. And wedding stuff. And romantic stuff.

'Til next time!

More Registry

2007-10-06T03:42:00.000-05:00

I'm in San Francisco, and I'm totally wired. It's almost 5am Ohio time, but I had a Red Bull and tea today, plus a late dinner, then I got to play Scattergories and watch the "wild ass" DVD, so I'm finding it hard to fall alseep.

Instead, I've been thinking about Adam and me, and how we're going to create our living space. I know that he thinks about getting a new place from time to time, which would be cool. Either way, we'll be making a new home for both of us, no matter where it is, and we can register for things that can help us do so.

A few more things I thought to register for (or ideas I got from friends) include:

- luggage
- photo frames
- 1000 thread count sheets

And then I just thought of maybe a big rug for the living room. Something that wouldn't completely cover the hardwood floors, but would be nice to have. Oh, and a welcome mat of some sort is NEEDED for the winter. So, adding those things to the list:

- cool big rug
- welcome mat

And, and!

- Mickey Mouse appliances!

Not sure how Adam would feel about a Mickey Mouse waffle maker, but I'll never buy one for myself, so why not? I already have the toaster!

Oh, and maybe a portable DVD player. On the long flight here, I was thinking of how much I'd have loved to have one. And potholders and kitchen towels, and maybe some new cooking utensils!

Rosa said to register for things we want but would never buy ourselves. And I started thinking of other possible stores, such as Pottery Barn and Linens N Things. She also told me that is is okay to register early because people might want to get us stuff already. I'd have it all shipped to Chicago. I kind of want to wait until I'm moved in, though. I want us to get the gifts together, if people decide to buy us stuff.

Registry

2007-10-03T17:13:00.000-05:00

When Adam and I first got engaged, he asked if we should register. I told him that we should wait until a few months before the wedding because the inventory changes so much at stores.

Adam is a true bachelor. He has two towels. TWO TOWELS. Maybe a few more, but I've never seem 'em. I told him that towels is definitely going on the registry.

Here are the things we definitely plan to register for:

towels
cookware (funky colors like orange and Brady Bunch green)
sheet sets
comforter

Between the two of us, we have plenty of dishes, silverware, and stuff like that. I live alone, and he has a lot of stuff, too. So we don't need too much. I don't think.

I want to register at:

Bed, Bath & Beyond
Target

What other things should we register for? Maybe a fancy coffee maker? A Kitchen-Aid stand mixer? Stores? Crate & Barrel? I need some ideas!

We've Got a Place!

2007-09-26T17:58:00.000-05:00

The site for the ceremony and reception has been booked!

Thanks to a very helpful person from the Low Budget Bride Live Journal community, I found out about a place that is pretty, reasonably priced, and convenient.

Adam and I will be getting married and receiving our guests at Mrs. Murphy & Sons Irish Bistro on November 01, 2008, at 3:30pm. A buffet dinner reception will follow immediately after.

I love the hardwood floors and the brick walls. That will fit in perfectly with our color scheme. I haven't had a chance to visit the place yet, but I did send Adam out with a long list of questions to ask. Not only did he get them all answered, but he took photos as well.

They're remarkably easy to work with, the price is right, and they have PARKING. A rarity in Chicago, let me tell you.

WHEW. Now that that's out of the way, I can breathe a bit easier. Ceremony site is the major issue. It's a small place, so we're going to have to keep the guest list to a tiny minimum. But it'll be better that way. Way more intimate.

Now I can relax. A little.

Invitations & Stationery

2007-09-24T18:06:00.000-05:00

Invitations by Dawn has DISNEY invitations. If I weren't trying to save money and have a low-budget wedding, I'd SO get these:

I mean, how cute, right?

But... Helen did offer to rustle up some samples for me, so of course, that will be my first choice. I'm looking forward to seeing what designs she comes up with for me. In the meantime, I am having a lot of fun looking at all the different catalogs and Web sites, and ordering free samples. You'd better believe I'm ordering a free sample of the Mickey Mouse one. :)

My second choice is getting invitations from Ann's Bridal Bargains. They have nice, simple invitations for as little as $35 for 100. I totally don't need that many, I'll probably only need to order 50, which is $30 or something low like that. Their most expensive is about $85 for 100, which isn't bad at all. Most places charge at least $130 for that many.

So far, my favorite catalog has been Invitations by Dawn; they have an amazing selection of invites, many that would perfectly match the theme of the wedding, but unfortunately, they have the price tag to go with it.

This is a list of things I absolutely need, stationery-wise:
- invitations (reception info will be printed on the invitation)
- response cards/envelopes
- "save the date" cards
- "thank you" cards (but those will not be custom ordered; I plan to get a plain box from Target or something!)

I wonder if I could get inexpensive "save the date" cards from Vista Print. IBD has magnets, which is a very charming idea. Expensive, but charming.

Thinking of invitations also gets me thinking of the verses. Verse This seems like a wonderful resource for all sorts of verses for all sorts of ceremonies. As you should know, this is my second marriage, but Adam's first. I have a little boy who is going to be part of the ceremony somehow. I need to communicate our personalities, the ceremony/reception information, and Aidan's involvement in 14 or fewer lines, plus a few extra for corner copy. I'm thinking this site will be helpful. They have loads of ideas.

Cake

2007-09-22T16:35:00.000-05:00

Last night, Tami came over with a cake that served two purposes. One was to congratulate me on the engagement.

The other reason was so I could taste the first wedding cake recipe!

Tami had spent hours making this cake for me. She used fresh lemons, whole milk, and two sticks of butter. The icing is buttercream and also homemade.

IT WAS SO FREAKING YUMMY OMGWOWWOWYES!

The flavor was perfect. It wasn't too sweet, but it had so much flavor and it was so tasty. I gobbled a small piece down in seconds, and wanted a second bigger piece but I was so full I couldn't finish it. My mouth was very happy.

THEN she showed me a drawing of what the design will look like:

Could she have done any better? This is freakin' perfect.
I showed Adam the pix this morning on email, and he approves.
Tami's doing our cake, YAY!!!!

And the cool thing? She left some of the cake here for me. Guess what I'm having for dessert tonight? Yummm.

Adam's so cute. He asked me "If you get all the big stuff done now, aren't you worried that you'll have nothing to do later?" Oh dear. He has no idea. As long as one is planning a wedding, there is always something to do. But getting the venue secured ASAP will give me a bit of breathing room. Trust me, this bride WANTS to get the big stuff out of the way, then she can have more fun with all the little details.

Details

2007-09-21T18:13:00.000-05:00

Adam and I want to have an autumn-themed wedding, so I've been scouring the Web looking for fun details and accents and decorations. I found the best deals and cutest things at Oriental Trading Company. Not only are their details adorable, but the prices are great too.

Here are a few things I'm considering:

The leaves around the candles would be autumn leaves, of course.

Adam's not too keen on the scarecrows. I am not terribly attached to them so if he really doesn't want them, that's OK. But they'd be cute. :)

Orange daisies. Yes, and yes. :) Rosa had them in her wedding and they were beautiful. I don't even want a bouquet; I'll be happy to carry a single flower.

I also want kind of a funky-looking cake. I lifted this picture from The Cake Blog because I thought the design was so cute and original. Now, as this bakery is based in San Jose, CA, I don't think I'll be able to get that actual baker to do my cake, but maybe Tami can pull off something similar, and in my colors, of course. An orange cake would be so awesome!

There is so much to think about. On the one hand, I want the wedding day to be here NOW so I can be married to Adam that much sooner, but then again, I know I have a LOT of work to do over the next 400 or so days, so it's GOOD that it's not time yet.

Still, I hope I don't Go Bridal. Hahaha.

Overwhelmed

2007-09-20T17:09:00.001-05:00

I won't be able to buy a dress for at least five or six months, and most of them are so expensive that I'll never be able to afford them, but that's not stopping me from perusing the sites and checking out the styles. I'm finding myself gravitating toward a particular style, but there aren't a lot of them out there. There are so many designers, so many styles, so many dresses...it's crazy! So, I've been kind of randomly going around, just saving .jpgs of anything that strikes my fancy. I've also learned a nifty trick to help me stay organized. I name the files this way: designerstylenumber.jpg. That way, when I want to find a certain dress again, I don't have to go through random picture files of dresses and go "Um... I don't remember where I found this!"

Today I went to the library and checked out a couple of planning books:

Going Bridal: How to Get Married Without Losing Your Mind
Wonderful Wedding for Cost-Conscious Couples

I think they'll be fun reads. The covers are neat, at any rate.

Adam and I are waffling on the date. Halloween would be a fun day, and easy to remember, but it's a Friday, and with most of our guests coming in from out of town, that could prove challenging. November 1st is a good day too. I like both days, and I told him that it's up to him. Hopefully we'll have a finalized date for you guys soon!

TheKnotDotCom

2007-09-19T22:32:00.000-05:00

I have taken the plunge and signed up at The Knot.
Who needs sleep? Seriously.
*stares glaze-eyed at all the cool stuff*
Wow.

Hi, folks!

2007-09-18T12:51:00.000-05:00

I'm on here, too!

There's a part of me that wants to go with the whole "all the groom has to do is show up" mentality, but I'll just be using that for the smaller details (I'll leave exact size of the candles, etc, for others to geek on :) ). As for the big picture, I'm very, very excited about having a great autumn wedding in Chicago, and I can't WAIT to be married to Ronni!

Intro & Welcome

2007-09-17T21:40:00.001-05:00

I've been toying with the idea of a wedding site for a few days now. I decided to go ahead and make one because a large number of our guests will be out-of-towners and this would be a cool way to keep those Internet-savvy folks in the loop. Check back often for updates, pictures, musings, thoughts, randomness, and all things wedding.

I cannot wait to marry Adam. The mere thought of spending the rest of my life with him makes me very happy, giddy almost! I could list dozens of reasons why he's so amazing, but I won't do it in this post. Keep checking back though. :)

Right now, we have a tentative date of Halloween 2008 in mind, and I have a skeletal guest list going. My friend Tami offered to do the cake. You know what that means? Lots and lots of tastings. Lots and lots. :) We've also got Jen Hathy on board to do the photos. She's the one who took the photo in the little "about us" blurb and the one in the header, and the one just above this paragraph. I want the theme to be autumn harvest with a few cute Halloweeny things thrown in and there. And CANDY! :)

I'm really excited, and I'll post as often as I can. At the moment, there is a cat on my lap demanding attention, plus I'm a bit hungry. I'm gonna take off for now. Cheers!